Assalamu alaikum dear parents ✨,
Marriage is a huge milestone in a Muslim’s life and a beautiful part of our deen. As parents, you play a crucial role in making this journey smooth and blessed for your children. The Prophet Muhammad ﷺ emphasised simplicity, guidance, and early unions to protect our youth from unnecessary hardships. So how can we support our children in finding the right spouse while also earning Allah’s ﷻ blessings? Let’s talk about it.
Have Open Conversations
Communication is key when it comes to marriage. Talk to your children about their thoughts, hopes, and concerns regarding nikah. Listen to them with an open heart, without judgment. When they feel heard and supported, they’ll be more comfortable sharing their feelings.
Many young Muslims worry about expressing their preferences in a spouse, fearing they’ll be misunderstood or dismissed. As parents, you can ease this stress by creating a safe space for these conversations. Allah ﷻ reminds us in the Qur’an:
"Indeed, Allah commands you to render trusts to whom they are due and when you judge between people to judge with justice."
[Surah An-Nisa, 4:58]
By prioritising your child’s well-being over societal pressures, you pave the way for a marriage that is built on love, faith, and harmony.
Keep Marriage Simple
The Prophet ﷺ taught us that the best marriages are the easiest:
"The best of marriages are the easiest."
[Ibn Majah, 1855]
Unfortunately, many families today get caught up in extravagant wedding expectations, high mahr, and financial demands. These pressures can cause unnecessary stress and delay marriage for no real reason. But what truly matters in a marriage?
- A spouse’s commitment to Islam
- Good character and compatibility
- A simple, barakah-filled celebration
By keeping the process simple, we follow the sunnah and ensure that Allah’s ﷻ blessings remain at the center of the union.
Don’t Delay When the Time Is Right
The Prophet ﷺ advised us not to delay marriage unnecessarily:
"Do not delay in three things: the offering of the prayer... and the marriage of a person when a suitable match is found."
[Jami’ at-Tirmidhi 171]
In today’s world, we see many delays due to career ambitions, financial concerns, or societal expectations. While planning for the future is important, waiting too long can lead to challenges—whether it’s struggling with loneliness, facing fitnah, or losing confidence in the process.
If your child is ready and a good match is found, support them in taking the next step. Making halal easy for them is a mercy, and it protects them from unnecessary hardships.
Marriage Is a Blessing, Not a Burden
Marriage is one of Allah’s ﷻ greatest blessings, described in the Qur’an as a source of peace and comfort:
"And among His Signs is that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that you may find tranquility in them, and He has placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed, in that are Signs for those who reflect."
[Surah Ar-Rum, 30:21]
Helping your child get married isn’t just about ticking off a life milestone—it’s about supporting their spiritual and emotional well-being. When done with sincerity and simplicity, it invites barakah into your home and your family’s future.
How You Can Help
Here are some ways to make marriage easier for your children:
- Keep communication open – Let them share their thoughts and concerns freely.
- Simplify the process – Focus on deen and character over status and wealth.
- Educate them – Teach them about the rights and responsibilities of marriage.
- Support good matches – When they find someone suitable, encourage them.
- Make dua – Ask Allah ﷻ to guide them to a righteous and loving spouse.
Remember, helping your child find a good spouse is an act of worship and an opportunity to gain Allah’s ﷻ pleasure.
Final Thoughts
As parents, your love and guidance mean everything to your children—especially when it comes to such an important decision. By making marriage easy, prioritising Islamic values, and encouraging them when the time is right, you’ll not only bring happiness to your children but also earn immense rewards from Allah ﷻ .
May Allah ﷻ bless our children with righteous spouses and fill their marriages with love, mercy, and barakah. Ameen.